Battle in My Mind

You are running for your life. A dragon is chasing you. And this is no ordinary dragon, he’s huge! Suddenly, you run into a dead end. You look left and right; the dragon has you trapped. You frantically wave your sword, which does nothing but tire you out.

Then, as if someone is looking out for you, you notice a cave in the wall. You quickly dive into the shelter it provides. You think through the options - Fight, Flight or Freeze. Everyone knows that those are the options when you are in danger. But no one ever talks about what happens when your back is against the wall and fleeing isn't an option. When your enemy is snarling at you, claws bared, ready to tear you to shreds, so freezing isn't an option either.

You know you have to fight, even though every fiber in your body longs to freeze up or run. But you have nowhere to run.

You step outside your little safe haven and get ready to fight the dragon. You look up at the beast and then you feel your heartbeat. Your heart is pounding in your chest; you can hear it in your ears. It's almost deafening.

You are light-headed, and the world around you feels like it's spinning out of control. It seems impossible to catch your breath. Yet here you stand, blade in hand, a huge dragon staring you down, ready to kill you.

You force yourself to take a breath, slowly inhaling, then exhaling. The dragon roars loudly, You try to scream and you quickly cover your ears, dropping your blade. You hear it hit the ground. You fight to breathe again.

You force your breath to slow down, as you listen to the sound of your own inhale and exhale. You feel your heart rate slow, and you bend down and pick up your blade again.

You need a plan. Throwing your blade around willy-nilly will get you nowhere fast. You look around, and you see the dragon, of course…but you notice that he isn't as big as you thought he was.

The next thing you notice is how green the trees and grass are. You realize that there are actually quite a few trees nearby; there might even be a way to sneak past the dragon through the trees.

You notice that the dead end you’re trapped in isn't as narrow as you thought it was before. You actually have room to move around.

You relax a bit, feeling less like a board. You see a bird fly by, and it gives you hope; you can do this.

Your sword feels lighter than it was before. Your armour seems lighter and less restricting than you remember it being.

You take a fighting stance and notice how much easier it is to move now; all the stiffness has left your body.

You feel how much easier it is to breathe. The air doesn't burn anymore.

You hear the dragon growl and see his feet moving back as he waits for some kind of attack, almost like he's taunting you.

You listen to your breath, slow and steady. As you breathe, your head feels less crowded and it is easier to think.

A bird sings nearby, interrupting your now clearer thoughts. Its song brings you even more hope.

You notice for a moment that your mouth is desperately dry and all you want is water.

You look back at the dragon and realize that he is much smaller than you remember. He hardly seems to be a threat now. You close your eyes and prepare to fight.

When you open your eyes, there's no dragon, and you're not outdoors. You are inside your own home.

You look down and see not a sword but your phone in your hand. Then you remember the call that set you off, a social engagement that you'd forgotten about - your whole evening looks different now. For a moment your heart rate quickens. You breathe, your anxiety won’t win another round.

You remind yourself, you will be fine. You have all the tools you need to handle this situation; you just used them. They might not be as sharp as a sword, but they might just be more useful.